"Baby No-Like"

Today, I had yet another near-fainting episode on the train. I figured I needed to eat some food to give me some energy. So, I had three donuts, an everything bagel with eggs and cheese, a tall mug of tea, and a slice of cantaloupe. No later than twenty minutes after my enormous binge, I was writhing in pain. My stomach felt like a man... stink nasty and helpless LOL. Men must hate me. Oh well. Anyway, as I was moaning in agony, all I could imagine was my daughter in utero kicking the heck out of me screaming "baby-no-like, baby-no-like!" It was as if she were punishing me for eating all the garbage I consumed. Sheesh. This is the LAST baby you hear me! mark my words. Tubal ligation in the house! IUD, or whatever works, I am officially RETIRING my uterus. I dedicate this blog to women everywhere who have been conditioned to believe that their sole purpose on this earth is to birth children. REJECT YOUR UTERUS! Tell it HELL NO!
I'm finished.